Basketball Wives - Doug and Jackie Christie Bringing on the Crazy Since 1994

Photo Courtesy of Jackie's Twitter

I have been holding off on making a post directed towards Basketball Wives L.A.'s resident geriatric pelican but I can't keep my feelings to myself any longer.  There is just too much tomfoolery and craziness associated with Jackie "Lazarus" Christie and her husband Doug and it all needs to be documented for my readers.  So, buckle up, Jackie. This one is for you!

A pic of Jackie and Doug circa 2002ish
  • Jackie and Doug have been married since 1994 and everybody knows *Phaedra voice* that Jackie is hyper-protective over Doug.  In the past, Doug was not allowed to speak to or make eye contact with any female unless Jackie was present.  Back in 2003, a poor woman by the name of Stephanie Shepard sued Doug, Jackie and the Sacramento Kings basketball association for wrongful termination when she was fired after Jackie complained about her to the organization.  Doug was a player on the Kings at the time and Sherpard's job was to work directly with the players.  So when Shepard left a voicemail on Doug's phone, she was just doing her job, right? Wrong! Jackie unleashed the dragon and raised hell in the front offices all over a damn voicemail.  Jackie thought Shepard had crossed the line and was being disrespectful by calling Doug.  If that ain't an insecure broad then I don't know what is.  But wait, there's more...

More after the jump

  • Numerous basketball fans have reported that back in the day, Jackie would not allow Doug to sign autographs for any female fans unless they asked Jackie for permission LOL.  But the best part is, allegedly Doug was the one who came up with this "rule" and Jackie was simply enforcing it.  

  • During basketball games (including crucial moments of the playoffs), Doug would take the time to salute his master  wife Jackie with a hand signal.  Doug would throw up the signal some 50 times per game.  Damn! He couldn't spend two hours of his life focusing on something other than Jackie's crazy ass?! Jackie and Doug confirmed that the signal was a sign for "I Love You".

  • Allegedly, Doug wanted to go to NBA player Mateen Cleaves' bachelor party and Jackie wasn't having it.  Instead of hiding Doug's car keys or maybe stashing his wallet in a bush, Jackie just set his entire BMW convertible on fire.

  • To make sure that Doug never cheated on her, Jackie would leave her children with her mother so that she could follow Doug's team to all of their away games. Of course wives are not allowed to travel with the team but this is not just any wife we are talking about.  This is Mrs. Jackie Christie the HBIC babyyy.  Jackie was allowed to fly with the team on their charter jet but once the plane landed, she would arrange for her own vehicle to drive her directly behind the team's bus. She would make Doug talk to her on a cell phone for the entire ride so that he would not have the opportunity to make any calls to any other women.

  • While playing for the Toronto Raptors, Jackie was not pleased with the female employees that would enter the locker room after the games to hand out statistics. Instead of being secure in her relationship and knowing in her heart that her husband would never cheat on her, Jackie ordered Doug to start changing in an adjacent room by himself and away from his team so that he would not come in contact with any females that might enter the locker room after the games.

  • This last morsel of information is alleged and you can do a simple search on the internet to corroborate this theory.  ALLEGEDLY, Doug cheated on Jackie back when they were dating.  Just like the majority of NBA players, Doug was tempted by the groupies that were throwing themselves at him after every game but when he cheated on Jackie, he felt remorse.  He did not want to lose the love of his Amazonian princess and so he promised to do whatever he needed to do to keep Jackie happy and to make their relationship work.  And this my friends, is the reason why Jackie has Doug by the balls.  She is allowed to do any and everything to insure that he will never even have the opportunity to cheat on her ever again.
If you have to go through these lengths to be sure that your husband is not cheating on you, is it really worth being married to him?  Jackie pretty much devoted her whole entire life to guarding Doug's package. When you allegedy neglect your own children by dumping them off on family members just so you can travel behind your husband and keep an eye on him then you have more problems than I (and Dr. Phil) can help you with.  I think Jackie could have saved herself a whole lot of stress if she just realized that nobody was/is checking for no Doug Christie!  

Tell me, what do you think of Jackie and Doug's relationship?
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