You know what I just realized? The Moose a.k.a. Nene Leakes didn't even make an appearance in this week's episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta. And to be honest, she wasn't even missed! This just proves that the show can carry on without her. I hope the Bravo execs are taking notes! Anywayho, let's get into the episode 14 recap.
Cynthia Bailey and Kenya Moore go to check out Claudia Jordan's new Atlanta high-rise apartment. Claudia finally has the place furnished and it's actually kinda cute! The ladies sit down and Claudia starts telling them about the Dish party she went to and how Porsha Stewart was acting like a nasty trollop. Claudia starts crying and tells the ladies that her issues with Porsha remind her of the issues she had in high school. You see, growing up as biracial, the girls in high school would tell Claudia that she wasn't black enough. Ummm...someone explain to me what that has to do with Porsha hating her azz? Claudia needs to quit with this tragic mulatto fable.
Kandi Burruss gets offered a role in a Christmas movie thanks to her hubby Todd Tucker. Kandi and Todd are flying out to L.A. for a day so she can film her part but Todd is packing extra suitcases so he can stay in L.A. a little longer after Kandi leaves.
Kandi tells Todd that he's always trying to leave her while she's the one who's always rushing to get back home to him and their kids. He even takes the last return flight of the day when he travels which makes Kandi think that he just doesn't like being in Atlanta with her. Todd tells her that he has business to take care of in L.A. Hmm...let's see...Todd has an office at the Kandi Factory....Todd works behind the scenes of Kandi Koated Nights....if Kandi has no business staying in L.A. for a couple extra days than neither does Todd! Todd's business IS Kandi's business! If Kandi is going home, he should be going home with the woman he chose to marry.
Todd goes on to say that sometimes they need their space from each other. Oh, and they've only been married for 6 months at this point. Kandi's playing dumb, she already knows what it is. Todd left his ex-girlfriend to go chase Kandi and her money. Now he's trapped in a marriage that he don't want to be in.
It's almost time for Apollo Nida to head off to his new home a.k.a. the federal pen. Apollo calls Peter Thomas one night and is talking crazy on the phone, so Peter heads over to wherever Apollo is staying (seriously, where does he live? That ain't Phaedra's home is it?").
The men go for a ride and Apollo starts spilling that sweet Lipton tea for dat azz!
Phaedra had been guarding her cell phone like her life depended on it. One night, she stepped away from her phone and a text message came through. Apollo picked up the phone and started reading the messages which were from some African named Mr. Chocolate. Every barren woman in Atlanta got her a damn African, huh?
The text messages pretty much confirm that Phaedra was having an affair. Now, I'm sure that Apollo had cheated on Phaedra during their marriage, but really, Phaedra couldn't wait for him to get locked up before she started sharing her honey with another man? Peter can't believe his ears and he can't wait to get back home to his wife so he can be messy and gossip.
Just like everyone else in America, Cynthia was shocked about the allegations. Phaedra tries to come across like this sweet and innocent Southern belle but in reality, she's just as trifling as Kenya, Claudia, Porsha, Kim Zolciak etc. etc. etc.....
Kenya is still trying to make her movie happen and she's holding auditions with Brandon and the rest of her crew.
Cynthia auditions for the part of a Jamaican lady and I know you can't tell in the picture, but she was looking bumbaclot mess!
Rickey Smiley wants peace in his work environment so he calls a meeting between Porsha and Claudia so they can squash their beef once and for all.
The ladies agree to be cordial with each other and then Rickey calls a prayer circle for unknown reasons.
I think Claudia is too damn sensitive to have beef with someone. If you're gonna be a filthy mcnasty and call somebody out on their thot-ful ways, you gotta learn to pay them dust during future interactions. Instead, Claudia wants to call Porsha out on her African sugar daddy, but then sit up in her lonely apartment and cry about Porsha being rude to her. Smh, get it together Claudia.
Kandi is back from her L.A. trip and her midget husband is of course still on the west coast getting his life and partying with his boys.
Now, this next scene, I pray that it was staged because I would be embarrassed as hayle if this was my real life playing out in front of millions of people.
Kandi tells Carmon that she thinks Todd is cheating on her because they only have sex once a week. She then tells Carmon that she threw out the D-word to Todd.
The D-word = divorce
These miniature people have been married for six damn months and Kandi's ready to throw in the towel already smh. If that's the case, they probably shouldn't have gotten married in the first place but you know Kandi was desperate to have her a huzzzbannnd just like her friends Phaedra and Toya Wright.
Carmon suggests that they go to counseling to work through their problems, and Kandi agrees.
Phaedra thinks Apollo is in the federal pen in Kentucky so she calls over a locksmith to get all the locks changed and she calls the garage door repairman to change the remote access.
Everything's running smoothly until Apollo shows up. OMG, if I were Phaedra I literally would have crapped all over them white jeans she was stuffed into. Imagine, you're thinking your husband is in jail, you're gonna call your side piece over in a few but first, you gotta change them locks...you look over your shoulder and who comes running up the driveway with the look of a deranged psychopath on his face? Your damn husband who you thought was already locked up. I'm glad Apollo didn't do anything stupid because this situation could have went all the way left real quick.
Phaedra's assistant Kalisha was shook as hell! How many times did she ask Phaedra if she should call the police? LOL. But really though, they had no grounds to get him arrested. He was in his home just walking around and talking a bunch of nonsense.
Apollo's friend Bun gets him to leave the house and Phaedra and the contractors are breathing a sigh of relief. But then, Apollo puts that Mercedes in reverse and drives his azz back down the street to their house.
He picks up a power drill and is holding it by his side and walking towards Phaedra. She tells him to get away from her but he won't stop. He gets all up in her ear and whispers, "Do...not...call...the...police...." y'all what's the opposite of panties getting wet because that's the reaction my body had when Apollo was acting a damn fool in the garage. He is really effed up in the head, you can tell. And I don't doubt that if Phaedra had gotten aggressive with him, he would have snapped and hurt her. I'm glad for Phaedra and her kids' sake that Apollo is locked up for the next 8 years, but she better hope he don't hire some goons to fukk with her while he's behind bars.
The best part of this episode: Apollo telling Phaedra to make sure he has a set of keys and garage remote control when he gets out of prison LMAOOOOO! Phaedra was like "I might not even be living here Apollo". You know Phaedra will probably be divorced and remarried to Chocolate by that time! Too bad she still has to deal with Apollo for the sake of her children.
Ladies, be careful who you lay down with!
What did you think of this week's episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta? What do you think about Phaedra cheating on Apollo with Mr. Chocolate? If you were in her shoes, would you remain faithful and wait 8 years for Apollo to get out of prison? Leave a comment below!